Skip to main content

Five Minute Friday: Afraid

I think it would take way more than 5 minutes to list the things I am afraid of. Even though I wear a ring every day that says "fear not", I am constantly afraid of something. I probably should change my driver's license to say I live in the state of Fear because I am always afraid.

Afraid that I will be alone forever.

Afraid that my broken heart will never heal.

Afraid that my broken marriage is all my fault.

Afraid that I am unlovable.

Afraid that I will never find what truly makes me happy.

Afraid that I will lose the people I love the most.

Afraid that the voices in my head that tell me I'm nothing, that I don't matter are the right ones and that the ones in my heart that tell me I do are the ones that lie.

Afraid that no one is reading this.

Afraid that I will fail at every single thing I attempt.

Afraid that no one cares and that my attempts to show others that I care about them go unappreciated.

Afraid that I am not good enough.

Afraid that the people I call friends really couldn't care less about me.

Afraid that before my time is up I won't have figured it all out.
Labels:

Comments

  1. AnonymousFebruary 1, 2013 at 2:55 PM

    Popping over from Five Minute Friday, and I'm so glad I did. Dear one, I have been where you are wondering if it was all your fault, if you were ever going to be loved again, if you're going to be alone forever, if your broken heart will ever heal, and I am here to tell you that you WILL heal in time. I am living proof. God can take any mess you have and turn it into a message. He did mine. Hang in there and keeping looking to Him for the reassurance you need.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shanae BranhamFebruary 1, 2013 at 4:17 PM

    Andrea, great post on fears! May God bless you with the faith to conquer the ones that need conquering.
    Cheers,
    Shanae
    My Five Minute Friday

    ReplyDelete
  3. UnknownFebruary 1, 2013 at 5:02 PM

    Hi Andrea! stopping by from FMF. Your list hits close to home with me. But I hang on to the knowledge that there is hope. I pray you are blessed in a special way this day!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Five Minute Friday: Roots

Lisa-Jo Baker (lisajobaker.com) hosts a weekly event on her blog called "Five Minute Friday". The rules are 1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking. 2. Link back here and invite others to join in. 3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community.. So here's my first try at this. Today's topic was Roots. Roots – I think about my grandparents who lived on a farm until my grandfather’s diabetes worsened and they moved to a town with a hospital nearby. My father still says he wished he could have kept that farm. I think of my grandmother who was a widow for 20 years. Every year she would stand over my PaPa’s grave, wishing she was with him. I think of my parents, a product of those grandparents, how hard my father worked to put 2 girls through
10 comments
Read more

Five Minute Friday: Time

Five Minute Friday is a writing event that has writers spending five minutes writing on the same topic and then sharing them at http://katemotaung.com/five-minute-friday/ . This week's word is Time. Sometimes time feels like this, like we are in it. Standing inside it, watching life pass by. It is so easy to get stuck in a time - in our pain, in our hurt. We hear the ache tick away in our head like a giant clock. Time, instead, is a gift. More time with family, more time to accomplish goals, more time to see the world. When you are hurting, it seems like time takes forever. One day turns into another day, turns into another day. When we hate a job, the five days of time that make up a work week seem to go on forever. But those five days are also a gift. Because these days, a job is not a guarantee. I want to see time as gift, not as a chore. I want to be on the other side of it, wishing there was more of it. Making the most of every hour, minute, and second instead of
6 comments
Read more

Five Minute Friday: Brave

Right now at this point in my life, it feels like the bravest thing I should be doing is trusting God's plan for me. It is so scary to hand everything over to Him and trust that it will all be alright. Or maybe what I should test my bravery on is trusting His timing.  I do trust that He has a good plan for me, I just wish He'd hurry up and reveal it to me. It's been six long years of waiting to see what good will come from my divorce. Six years of feeling broken, worthless, and unlovable. I believe with my whole heart that He will make good from what was meant to harm me, He will give me double for my trouble, but I want my beauty for ashes RIGHT NOW! I also need to find the bravery to believe the good things people tell me about me. This has been a really hard week for me and through their words and their shows of concerns, I know that people care about me but I can't find the courage to turn that into self-love. When I look in the mirror, I still see ug
8 comments
Read more