Skip to main content

31 Days: Do Not Compare Yourself To Anyone Else

Tonight is one of my favorite evenings of the month - book club. I love the women in my book club and how they have made me feel so welcome from day one. I think in all of the months since I joined the club, I have read one book but it doesn't matter. It is a great evening of good food, lots of laughter, and the fellowship I craved when I looked for a church.

The thing that I love about this club is that each one of us are so different. There is a soon-to-be retired laboratory manager, a school librarian, a law library director, a college professor, a kindergarten teacher, an accountant, an office manager, and a retired minister. Everyone is so diverse and I am inspired every time we gather together.

The one thing that has amazed me from the start is I've never found myself comparing my life to theirs. I've never been jealous or felt insecure when I've spent time with them. OK, I will admit that I am envious that their houses are suitable for such a gathering and that they appear to be spotless (unlike my house with its ruined plaster, unfinished projects, and dust bunnies run amok). There are times I have aspired to be like them but I have never compared myself and felt like I fell short in their eyes. There is such a comfort in this.

There are two quotes that are very similar but both amazing. My favorite is by E.E.Cummings, "To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting." My second favorite is attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson, “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Isn't it interested that two great writers felt compelled to give us the same inspiration - be yourself no matter what the world tries to make you into.

There is no way to achieve this if you are comparing yourself to anyone else. You are unique. Embrace that. Walk away from people who don't appreciate that and find people who do. Comparison is exhausting. The standards of what is cool and fashionable are a moving target. Let your target being comfortable in your own skin and loving who you are.


  1. Love this post. They're two of my favourite quotes.

    1. Thank you - I'm so glad you love it!


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Write 31 Days

I have struggled with a theme for this year's 31 days. I waited for the Write 31 Days prompts, hoping I would be inspired. But when I got to some tricking questions, I abandoned that idea. Then my thought was Follow My Dreams with the things I should be doing to achieve that goal. But then I got my daily text from that read "How often do we think 'When I get to X, then I'll feel good...pushing happy to the future'". Am I waiting until I feel like I have achieved enough steps in my journey to be happy?  I beat myself up so much for not doing what I think I should be doing, I couldn't spend 31 days doing that to myself. Then the Five Minute Writes prompts came and I thought, "Maybe I can build action points around those points to spend my October accomplishing things." But isn't that still telling myself that I'm not good enough?

So for this Write 31 Days, I'm going to do just that. Write. I'm not going to try to fit acc…

31 Days: Invite for Five Minute Friday

Is there anything better than receiving an invitation to do something fun? This is a photo from a concert that my friend invited me to attend with her. It is the band Dawes. The evening was so much fun. We grabbed dinner at a restaurant my friend had never been to and then we stood in line for the general admission show. Since we were the third and fourth people in line, we were able to get right up next to the stage. It was one of the most amazing evenings I've ever had.

It was so nice that my friend, someone I met at church, remembered that I liked this band and invited me to join her at their concert. It is hard to make new friends after a certain age and this invitation from her made me so thankful that I had someone to go out and have fun with.

I think invitations are one of the best things that being the part of a church bring to my life. On my first Sunday there, someone invited me to attend a Sunday School class. The next invitation I received was for the women's book…

31 Days: Discover for Five Minute Friday

In 2010 I was in New Orleans for work. I had a free morning and I wanted to see St.Louis Cathedral so I headed out from my hotel to find Jackson Square. Except I went the opposite direction I should have and discovered the Garden District instead. It wasn't what I set out to see but it was a discovery none the less. Instead of finding a grand church, I found streets lined with beautiful homes like this.

Isn't life so much like that? You have your mind set on one path and you discover something completely different. And so often that discovery is so much better than what you set out to do.

The problem is that so often we don't let ourselves discover the beauty in the difference or even the beauty in the journey to the discovery. We get so blinded by what we expected or wanted that we miss the chance to discover something wonderful.

Luckily instead of turning around and heading back to my hotel, I decided to see what I could discover in the opposite direction and I saw beau…