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Day 16: Detours and Timing‏

On my way back to work after lunch, I encountered a detour that wasn’t there when I went to work this morning. I was so frustrated. I had to weave my way around my downtown’s one-way streets to get back to the office. Once I got to work, I realized that detour was a metaphor for my life. The path I’m on right now is not the one I would have chosen. I had a nice straight path to happily ever after planned. I did eventually get back to work and I can also get to that happily ever after once I’ve been through this detour of brokenness. And that happily ever after waiting for me could very well be so much happier than the one I had planned.

However, just like my frustration in the length of time it took me to get back to work, this detour of my life is taking way longer than I would like.  I believe with all my heart the words in Jeremiah 29:11. I believe that God has plans to prosper me and not to harm me. That He plans to give me hope and a future.  It’s the timing of those plans that I have problems believing in. I often say that while God was passing out patience, I was holding the door for everyone else. I have no patience. I’m very good at surrender, at falling to my knees and turning my life over to God, telling Him that I trust His plan for my life. But when that plan doesn’t materialize on my timetable, I lose hope. I get frustrated and think that God has forgotten me or that maybe I haven’t done everything in the right way to get my breakthrough. Then I do my best imitation of the Israelites and return to the desert to circle that mountain of sadness for the umpteenth time.

My prayer every day is to accept this season of my life, to let it show me things about God and myself that I would never have realized if I were still married. I pray that this detour makes me a better, stronger person. And most importantly I pray for faith in the perfection of God’s timing and the belief that I will have that perfect happily ever after that I’ve always wanted, even if the road to it has detours in it.

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