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Day 9: What Once Was A Beginning

Today should have been my 19th wedding anniversary. Instead this is the fourth-year I'm marking this date without my husband. The end of my marriage was not of my choosing. I can't even explain really what happened, that's how far out of my hands it all feels. I know what he told me the day he said he was moving out, I have emails and notes on conversations we had after he left but I still search for the reasons why he decided he didn't want to be married anymore. I have my theories and others have offered their theories but at the end of the day, it simply comes down to this - I am on my own, trying to make a life out of the brokenness.

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